Friday Gay Blogging

Just a few stories that struck my fancy. There are lots more out there.

Timothy Kincaid has a note on the Utah marriage announcement that generated a little controversy -- rather less than one would expect, all things considered. What struck me about it was this comment about recognition of gay marriages, which I've made a point of before:

Not because their state will recognize their marriage; most probably won’t. But because their neighbors will.

I've called it "social validation," and it's the main reason the word "marriage" is so important. It marks your place and status within the group, and it's a major reason I'm not willing to hand the word over to the churches -- it's not theirs.

On a related note, an article on straight support from Gay.com:

When Marisa Miller married David Wolfson last year, the couple added a statement to their vows that they both passionately believe in the right of all people to marry regardless of sexual orientation.

Of course, there's always a radical PC asshole in the mix:

Some, like Pattrice Jones, compare straight couples' efforts at solidarity to a white person joining a whites-only country club and making a quick statement of support for blacks who are excluded.

"Just don't join the club; it's that simple," said Jones, a lesbian author.

After a wedding last year in which a straight couple read a statement of solidarity with gay couples, Jones said her "gay friends rang to tell me about it. They were horrified and really annoyed. We all felt it was so wrong to grab all the benefits that marriage gives you and just make a little statement to calm your guilt."

Can we talk about the unbelievable arrogance in the comment about calming your guilt because your gay friends can't get married? Lord. Love. A. Duck. Why should this person assume that straights are guilty about getting married? I've yet to meet a straight married couple who feel guilty about it. And why should they? Particularly someone who is generous enough to use their own special day -- and it's about them, honey, not about you -- to make a statement in support of us? Y'know, Miz Jones, they didn't have to do that.

Another part of the price tag -- for DADT, anyway. This report, from Andy Towle, has that sort of irony I'd rather not see more of:

Between 1998 and 2003, the GAO found that more than 60 gay linguists were discharged from the Army under 'Don't Ask, Don't Tell'.

Now, the Army finds itself in urgent need of linguists so it is planning to offer a six-figure bonus to retain them:

Writes Steve Ralls in the Huff Post: "This morning's Christian Science Monitor reports that the Army is preparing to offer a staggering $150,000 retention bonus to service members who are proficient in Arabic, "in reflection of how critical it has become for the US military to retain native language and cultural know-how in its ranks."

So, in addition to a moral waiver for your drug-dealing, wife-beating, petty larceny, or whatever, if you speak Arabic you can make a bundle just by staying in. Nice deal.

Kanye West seems to have made himself a one-man hip-hop pro-gay army. From Towleroad, this video:



And via Joe.My.God, this quote:

Open your fucking minds. Open your minds. Be accepting of different people and let people be who they are. You know how many people came to me calling me gay cause I wear my jeans the fresh way? Or because I said hey, dude, how you gonna say 'fag' right in front of a gay dude's face and act like that's ok. That shit is disrespectful.

Also via Joe, some interesting news about divorce rates among married gays -- or, in this case, "civil unioned."

Between December 2005, when gay and lesbian couples gained the legal right to formalise their relationships, and December 2007, there were 24,629 civil partnerships in England and Wales.

Couples have to wait at least a year before they can apply for a dissolution of their partnership.

Her Majesty's Court Service told PinkNews.co.uk that between December 2006 to 28th July 2008, there have been just 245 petitions for a dissolution.

As Joe notes:

Of course, most of those civil unioned in the first year were probably long-time couples whose relationships had already weathered many years, possibly making them less likely to separate quickly. Still, I find this 1% number rather remarkable.

So do I. I suspect that in fifty years, divorce rates might be comparable, after it's no longer such a struggle to get married in the first place. But maybe not.

And in a related note, Joe -- who is a wellspring of news this week -- pointed us to this report on adoption:

Men are twice as likely as women to adopt a child, the CDC's latest adoption figures show. There are a number of surprises in the CDC data, which come from 2002-2003 interviews with a nationally representative sample of 12,571 U.S. residents aged 15 to 44.

At least part of this seems to be fueled by gay male couples wanting children:

"We've seen an increase in same-sex couples adopting, and this is a trend all over the country," Hober tells WebMD. "If you think about same-sex couples, gay men who want children really have to adopt, but gay women can have their own children. I don't see as many gay female couples adopting as gay male couples."

So much for the "selfish hedonist" meme.

Dessert by Parou Tudo, thanks to Made in Brazil.



And as an added treat, watch the video:



I mean, is he cute, or what?

TTFN