We're Not Only Everywhere, We're Inevitable

Wonderful story at NYT on coming out in middle school, which when I was that age was unthinkable.

Though most adolescents who come out do so in high school, sex researchers and counselors say that middle-school students are increasingly coming out to friends or family or to an adult in school. Just how they’re faring in a world that wasn’t expecting them — and that isn’t so sure a 12-year-old can know if he’s gay — is a complicated question that defies simple geographical explanations. Though gay kids in the South and in rural areas tend to have a harder time than those on the coasts, I met gay youth who were doing well in socially conservative areas like Tulsa and others in progressive cities who were afraid to come out.

I often refer to myself half-jokingly as a "Kinsey 6" -- I've always liked boys, and I've always known that I like boys, but when I was, say, twelve or thirteen, there was no such thing as "gay." I think kids are coming out earlier in large part because now there is an identity that fits.

After all, I’d known on some level that I was gay when I was their age. If I were growing up today, it’s possible that I would feel emboldened enough to confide in my parents, or at least a close friend, that I was gay. I’d also spent the morning of my visit reading a handful of studies about when gay and lesbian youth first report an awareness of same-sex attraction. Though most didn’t self-identify as gay or lesbian until they were 14, 15 or 16, the mean age at which they first became aware of that attraction was 10. Boys tended to be aware about a year earlier than girls.

It's a very good article, a nice balance between anecdotes and issues. It's even funny in places. Read it.